Remember who is truly ugly in this world.

In the world people face today, especially teenagers, we are constantly faced with issues on how we look, or at least appear, to others. Media adds to this with all of their adds and promotion of all of the millions of products we NEED to buy to look our best. A new pill that makes us thinner, a new shoe that will help us tone our butts and thighs all day long, makeup that hides our "imperfections", shakes that will help us gain so much muscle we'll look like we belong in a Mr.Universe pageant, the list goes on and on. And with all of the chaos going on around us, we always forget SOCIETY is what's ugly, not us. Sure some of us probably need to lose weight for our health, and makeup does make us feel really pretty, but none of it is necessary and it is why our society is so judgmental. All of us are guilty of it. When you see your crush with someone new, the first thing we do, as humans, is point out every one of their flaws. She has a big forehead. He doesn't even lift. She is so fat. His hair looks funny. We all sit around and talk about how bullies put others down to make themselves feel better when we do the same exact thing. I asked some of my friends to send me pictures of them holding up their insecurities...and I am surprised at some of the responses I got. If we learn to accept our insecurities, they can help us grow as people. We will learn not to judge others as much, and if we all did this, the world would be a better place. Now I'm not sitting here thinking world peace is going to be a direct result of people accepting their insecurities, but at least we will have happier people living in such a chaotic world that already has enough hate in it.

It won't be easy. And it won't happen immediately. But acknowledging your insecurities and understanding why you have them is the first step to accepting them and moving on. If you'd like to send in your own "Confidence Project" picture or story, email me at ourbeautifulselves@gmail.com

Stay beautiful<3

That cliche of being beautiful on the inside...

Like I have said many times in other posts, you will never be perceived as beautiful and confident if you aren't on the inside. These are just some inspirational pics I found:)

 Okay now today's blog is about the gif above from my favorite TV show, Awkward. Meet Sadie. Sadie is a b*tch. Excuse my language, but she is a bully and does nothing but point out other people's flaws and mistakes. If you want a more in-depth description of her....google it;) Anyway, she has this "fat journal" where she records what she eats and exercise activity and what not...well this is a quote about that journal. Sadie has a very common problem. I have this problem with my friends....most of my girl friends are thin, fit young women with nice bodies and beautiful personalities. This is sometimes a problem for me because I constantly compare myself to them. The thing I have come to realize is that I am not...nor will I ever be...those girls. I was blessed with a body that is beautiful in its own way. I have more to brag about in some areas then others and have less in other areas. But my body is unique and nobody else will ever have the body that is uniquely mine.



Sorry for the crappy, cliche, short blog today....BUT I am working on TWO very special things:)

1- an awesome visual project for this blog
AND
2- a vlog:)

Look insecurities....it isn't me this time...it's YOU!

 If you had a friend who talked to you like you talk to yourself....how long would you keep them as a friend?

 

               So this week, I wanted to talk about the way you talk to yourself. I call it "self-speak." You need to treat yourself like a prized possession. Wake up every morning and tell yourself how beautiful you are...if you can't do that at least give yourself a compliment or two (Oh lovely hair today Hannah!!) because sometimes you just have to fake it until you make it. The only way to become truly successful and happy is to be confident. Your goals will be nothing but dreams until you are confident enough to chase them. I have two basic steps to start your journey to the things illustrated in the chart below :)

 

 Step 1........STOP LISTENING TO THE MEDIA. This doesn't mean cut yourself off from TV and Facebook, but it does mean to budget your time well and concentrate on your goals more than the latest Hollywood gossip. When you see commercials or shows that promote changing the way you look or who you are...tune-out. Change the channel, turn the TV off, flip off the TV.....do something that reminds yourself that no "get fit quick" plan or "low cost lypo" will make you love yourself. You will NEVER be perfect, so don't strive for perfection. Strive for happiness.

 Step 2....BREAK UP WITH YOUR INSECURITIES...do it through a letter or face-to-face in the mirror. I am not even joking right now. The other day I stood in the mirror and straight up said "Look insecurities...it is hard to say this, but it isn't me...it's you. you make me unhappy and you do nothing but bring me down." Will you look a little crazy? Sure. Will you feel silly? Probably. It doesn't work right away, but shutting down your insecurities little by little will minimize them to the point where you can brush them off like dirt on your shoulder. Today I was out with friends and I tried on a Wonder Woman Halloween costume (because who wouldn't want to be Wonder Woman!?) and my friends really wanted to see it. According to them, I looked really good and they thought I should buy it. I shut the dressing room door and looked at myself and saw a whale standing in front of me....needless to say I won't be going back for that costume. But when I got home, I realized what I had done to myself. I gave into self-pressure (like peer-pressure but worse...) I talked myself out of doing something I really wanted to do because I felt a little insecure. I just had a little discussion with myself in a mirror and now I WILL be going to get a Wonder Woman costume...one that I feel comfortable in because I am tired of bullying myself around. It is time to break up with my bad thoughts. It is the first step to happiness....and a cute Halloween costume.

 I know today's blog wasn't very long or descriptive, but I have been really busy and it is late. I promise to start blogging more once my schedule is balanced. I am working on confidence myself, but I hope I can help you along with your self-image as well(: I just want every person to be able to say:

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 video i found that has some really shocking facts!!!

11 FACTS ABOUT BODY IMAGE VIDEO

That one thing for the new School Year(:

That one thing<3 Gotta love 1D


Okay so I have once again been gone for a very long while....and I am sorry but between my own confidence issues and enjoying summer I really didn't have the time or words to put into a blog. I have more [bittersweet] news....I will be gone this week (Aug. 20-24) being a camp counselor for CAMP HOPE<3 It will be a really great experience but I will not be able to blog at all. I do, however, think going to this camp will inspire and motivate me to blog more often. So now....ONTO THE BLOG(:
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School will be starting soon everyone!!! And it may have started for a few of you already! So first day of school you will wake up and make sure you have your backpack/bag, pens and pencils, paper, binder, cute new clothes, hair done all nice, and that attitude of hanging onto every last piece of summer. But one thing you cannot forget to pack, especially if it is a super big day like mine (last first day of high school CLASS OF 2013 or maybe your first day of high school CLASS OF 2016), is your CONFIDENCE. It is the number one thing that will help you through your stressful first week and maybe even grab the attention of that cute guy/girl you saw in first period;)

My advice for keeping this confidence not only the first week but all year is to have "that one thing." Have a go to ____ that whenever you see it you remember to keep your head up high. I actually have a few things like this only because they are mostly jewelry and I can't always wear them. I have a rubber bracelet that actually says confidence, a pair of flower earrings that I adore, and my new favorite chapstick that is flavored so deliciously!!! These reminders don't have to be physical either. Some days I wake up and put on some uplifting music that puts me in a great mood in the morning that lasts all day(: Sometimes I write sappy teenage poetry or sing badly at the top of my lungs dramatically on my balcony.(: Even volunteer work can help if that's what makes you happy! It is all up to you!!!

And, like I always say, when you are confident it is a lot easier to pass it on. I'm sorry but I have a lot of friends who are very insecure and I love them but I won't go to them when I am feeling insecure because I just get empty reassurance. You cannot reassure someone if you aren't sure enough yourself because you end up telling others what they want to hear instead of something that can truly help.
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ANOTHER BACK TO SCHOOL TIP::::
Okay so we all make those "New Year's Resolutions" that maybe last until mid-February if you really stick with them :P I am guilty of doing it to, but I honestly think the best time to make these resolutions is at the beginning of a new school year(: Think about it: you have a brand new beginning, new teachers, new classrooms, you make new friends, see new people. You have the chance for a life makeover! So in spirit of this I have made 7 "back to school resolutions"(:
1- Blog at least once a week
2- Vlog at least once a week (YES! The vlog is coming!!!)
3- Start a personal blog to get through the tough times
4- Dress in a way that makes me feel good!
5- Get all A's on my first report card of Senior year!!
6- STOP PROCRASTINATING!
7- Join at least 2 more clubs this year

So I challenge you to do the same(: Comment your list of them below or email them to me at ourbeautifulselves@gamil.com or even facebook them to me if you are on my personal facebook(:
Have a great rest of the summer and an even better school year!!!!
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:) Sorry I just had to<3
STAY BEAUTIFUL AND LET LIFE HAPPEN <3
Check out my best friends new blog(: She is great with words----> emmaknowsall17.blogspot.com

Photo-Stop

          In the August issue of Seventeen Magazine, editor-in chief Ann Shoket has made a promise to her teen readers.  The promise comes in the form of a “Body Peace Treaty,” vowing to “never change girls’ body or face shapes” with photoshop or airbrushing.  Pinned side by side were two nearly identical pictures detailing in red ink the exact changes made to a photograph before it reaches the glossy pages of Seventeen magazine: clearing a loose hair or two, removing a visible bra strap, smoothing clothing folds and changing the color of a drape in the background.  The entire page is signed two X’s, two O’s and a single, friendly A for Ann Shoket, as though the entire thing was passed between friends through folded notes over an Elementary school desk.
          Julia Bluhm, the fourteen year old girl who inspired this promise with her petition and mock photo shoot, is claiming a victory for girls everywhere, and few, including myself, are going to argue with her.  And now a new set of girls, seventeen year old Emma Stydahar and sixteen year old Carina Cruz, are following Bluhm’s momentum and asking Teen Vogue to take a similar promise with a very different response.
          After they held a mock runway featuring real and diverse teen girls outside of Teen Vogue’s office, they reportedly were given a short meeting with the editors of Teen Vogue, where they were handed issues of Teen Vogue littered with Post It notes designating diversity as they believed it; mostly skinny african american models.  The girls were then sent away with their homework.
          It’s the industries little open secret; the glossy fantasy we see in the pages of magazines and advertisements everywhere is only slightly more achievable as a CGI dragon.  That super skinny celebrity you saw on the cover doesn’t really have skin that clear, her hair is not always that perfect, and no, she does not actually that skinny.  For good measure, the editors shaved five pounds off of her sides with a computer program before sending it to the press, for thousands of people to sigh at, never wondering where she must keep her kidneys.
           According to Seventeen Magazine, that has never been an option.  Body and face shape alterations were always ethically out of line, which might explain why they were so receptive to Bluhm’s complaints.  But according to Teen Vogue, body shape alterations have never been an option either, at least when it comes to the non-models and readers they regularly feature in their magazine.  That has to mean something?  Right?
          The use of photoshop to alter weight and body shape, lighten darker skinned models and erase features in an attempt to uniform beauty are unquestionably wrong in my opinion, especially when it deals with younger readers, like those Seventeen and Teen Vogue inevitably reach. But the real question doesn’t rest in those issues, since cooperative or otherwise, both magazine have said that they do not alter body size.
          Julia Bluhm’s petition included a request for one, unaltered, non-photoshopped spread per issue.  That request was denied.  Both girls have requested diversity within the magazine, including different races and body sizes besides that of the typical model.  Those requests, it seems, have been skimmed over.  And looking through one of my sisters issues of Teen Vogue, out of the easily hundred women featured within, there were no more than ten non-white models, and only one body shape.
          To be fair, not all blame can be placed upon the magazines.  Designers enjoy the ideal presented by the photographer, and as a result, they usually only send the smallest sizes of their clothing samples.  Unless designers start sending more realistic sizes, bigger models are not only unwanted, they are useless.   
          Magazines like these exist to present a fashionable fantasy, where people wake up each day with obedient hair and perfect complexions.  And people pay for these magazines for that fantasy, right?  These magazines never promised to show non-fiction, and they never warned us they wouldn’t.  
          So where do we draw the line?
          Is photoshop okay for loose hair and bra straps, or is that the same as digital liposuction?  And what constitutes diversity and what is fair of us to expect?  And who do we blame?
          Comment below with your opinions.

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Astley, Amy, ed. Teen Vogue Aug. 2012: n. pag. Web.

          

Fleming, Olivia. "'We're Being Unfairly Accused': Teen Vogue Dismisses 14-year-old during Meeting after Anti-photoshop Protest." Daily Mail. N.p., 12 July 2012. Web. <http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2172781/Were-unfairly-accused-Teen-Vogue-dismisses-14-year-old-girls-meeting-anti-Photoshop-protest.html?ito=feeds-newsxml>.

         

Intern Lauren. "Seventeens No-Photoshop Pledge: Will Teen Vogue Be Next." Bust Magazine. N.p., 6 July 2012. Web. <http://bust.com/blog/seventeens-no-photoshop-pledge-will-teen-vogue-be-next.html>.

          

Shoket, Ann. "Hi from Ann." Seventeen Aug. 2012: n. pag. Web. <http://http://i2.cdn.turner.com/cnn/2012/images/07/05/ann.august.editors.letter.pdf>.

Pep-ception

I like pep talks.  
            I like giving pep talks.  If I wasn’t so stupid when it came to sports, I might make a wonderful career as a high school football coach, just to be the guy giving the inspiring-pre-half-time-comeback-speech to the tune of a Beethoven symphony rip-off.  (I wonder if I could do that freelance...)

However, I do give my regular pep talks here, online.

Before I sit down and write anything for OurBeautifulSelves, I give myself audience.  I imagine that every single insecure individual I’ve ever known has been magically merged together into one broken, ambiguously raced/gendered loved one, and I end up spending the next half hour tweaking together the best literary hug I can.

The Bad Blogger Blues

Okay internet.  It's Evvan again.

So in case you haven’t noticed, I haven’t exactly been a very good blogger recently.  I would look back and give you the exact number of weeks I’ve been out of commission, but I’m afraid that even knowing such sensitive information, let alone posting it, would alert the local authorities of my misdemeanor.  

And I wouldn’t want to be the one to cost this site it’s casual blogging license, now would I?

Now, I wish I could say I was busy with personal problems or a family crisis (is that wrong?).  I really, really wish I could say that I was busy spying on the Soviets in a time traveling spaceship or organizing the Avengers initiative, but that would just be silly (and highly classified).

No, unfortunately, all the good excuses go to other people.  I have been busy with the end of school, which we all know is nothing anyone ever really worries about.

No, my only excuse is good, old fashioned writers block. 

I had ideas for you guys.  I had messages to tell you.  But every time I sat in front of a computer, I couldn’t get a draft down, or my draft was daft and ended in the trash.  You get the idea.

But the real irony is, that those feelings I had for my work are the exact same feelings people may have for themselves.  Every day we have to stand up and present ourselves to the world.  Every day we wake up with a draft, or perhaps a blank page, and we spend our time working to perfect that work of art that is our bodies into something we can be proud of.

I was ashamed of my work, but why was I.  There was nothing to be worried about, and there is nothing that you should be worried abo-

…

…

Wait.

Am I really doing this?

Am I that guy now?  That writer?

Sigh.  I’m just going to cut this off where it is.  

Expect a more regular posting in the future.  I won’t give a schedule but I’ll try for something.  

…
           

I’m really sorry about that...  “Every day we wake up with a draft.”  What was I thinking...